I had the chance to teach some Steinbeck recently, as part of my PGCE, so I ended up re-reading Of Mice And Men as research. I probably won't end up delivering the lesson I'd planned (for reasons I won't bore you with) but I thought I'd share something I discovered in the novel's introduction... it may offer a little comfort to the struggling and frustrated writers among us.
Even when financially secure, Steinbeck wrote out of a kind of liminal zone: on the one hand confident in his art, secure in his expression; while on the other doubtful of his abilities, puritanically wrestling with a sluggish will. Over and over in the journals he kept while composing his novels, he records his angst, easing the self-doubt, so it seems, in the very process of writing the revelatory words:
"It is strange how this goes on. The struggle to get started. Terrible. It always happens... I am afraid. Among other things I feel that I have put some things over. That the little success of mine is cheating. I don't seem to feel that any of it is any good. All cheating."
Writing was Steinbeck's passion and his livelihood, but it was also a perpetual challenge... even with public recognition, [Steinbeck] wrote with a considerable degree of anguished doubt about his own creativity.
On the one hand, I take comfort in that. On the other... it strikes me that even Steinbeckian success doesn't bring satisfaction. Still, self-doubt is always better than smug complacency.
By the way, did I mention that Too Much Sex & Violence #2 is out now...?
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I've taught 'Of Mice And Men' as a GCSE English set text a few times and really like it - the book at the teaching of it. I tend to take the view that, whilst they really should, kids won't read set books, and OM&M was perfect for our fairly long lessons - do some set-up tasks, read a chapter, short answers to secure some knowledge, discussion and longer answers for understanding- it was always a very nice couple of hours. And then you can show them the film and they all cry about the bloody dog.
Odd. I posted a comment yesterday. It probably was the best comment I've ever written
Now I feel like a real writer. I can so self doubt no problem. It's a passion of mine.
Is it ironic that I don't feel confident enough to comment on this...I'll never be smug and complacent about anything!
I've never actually read 'Of Mice And Men'. Wonder if it's out of copyright yet?
I wish I could find the struggles of other writers, especially famous ones, comforting, but the writers life is just a den of solipsism...
Well, I ought to be a great writer, because I can self-doubt better than anyone.
Or can I? Maybe I can't doubt myself as well as I think. . .
I also went through a John Stenbeck phase in my early 20s.
It is difficult to imagine a more affecting American writer of the 20th century, so as you say, good to know that this literary legend was as beset by doubts and motivational sluggishness as the rest of us.
Grapes of Wrath was his finest in my view and reduced me to tears with its pathos.
Good luck with the PGCE
Adam - sadly the choice was taken out of my hands, for reasons far too dull to go into. We did poetry instead. And, of course, they mostly hated that too.
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